The Queen of the Big Time by Adriana Trigiani

Author:Adriana Trigiani
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
ISBN: 9781588364050
Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
Published: 2004-08-08T23:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER SEVEN

Every Christmas Eve, Papa would go out to the woods on the outskirts of Delabole farm and cut down a tree. Mama baked gingerbread cookies, which we iced, then hung on the tree with satin ribbons. There was a cookie with each of our names on it, which we ate on Christmas morning. Tiny candles were nestled in foil cups, attached to the branches, and we’d light them as soon as the sun went down. There was caroling, and midnight Mass, and presents that we made for one another. The holiday was always the happiest time for our family, but not anymore.

This year, it seems everyone in the Castelluca family is sad for a different reason. Mama and Papa miss Assunta, I’m sad without Renato, and my younger sisters can see that the farm life they loved is not going to last forever. Alessandro wants to focus on importing and open a shop in town, and without his help Papa won’t be able to keep the farm going. Alessandro has asked Mama and Papa to move into town, and they are considering it.

Elena has put up a tree in the front window on Dewey Street. She has invited the family for Christmas dinner. I place cloth napkins next to the dishes on the table. “Nella?” Elena gives me a pair of candlesticks to place on the table. “I want to talk to you about Alessandro.”

“About how he feels about you?”

Elena inhales quickly. I look at her.

“How did you know? You couldn’t tell, could you?” Elena puts her hand to her face, embarrassed.

“No, of course not. He told me about his feelings months ago.”

“What did you say to him?”

“I told him to wait until a year had passed. And now it’s been a year.”

“He has asked me to marry him. What do you think?”

“I think … he’s a very good man. Do you love him?”

“Very much. It’s only when I think about our sister that I hesitate.”

“Elena,” I say, taking her hand into mine. “She would want her daughter raised by a good woman.”

“Thank you, Nella.”

“And she would want her daughter to have a proper upbringing.”

“You know, people talk. I hear things. There have been comments about me.”

“Who cares what people think?”

“I do. I’m raising a baby, and I care how she will be treated. I don’t want her to be ashamed of my choices.”

“Have you talked to Mama and Papa?” I ask.

“Not yet. I’m afraid to. I’m afraid they’ll think it’s disrespectful to Assunta.”

“I think you’ll be surprised. Mama and Papa want you to be happy. And they love Alessandro. You haven’t done anything wrong.”

Elena’s voice breaks. “I know. But I wish …”

“What do you wish?”

“That I would have met him first. That he would have loved me first. That the baby was ours. I know it’s not a perfect world, but why did it happen this way? When Assunta was alive, I was always in her shadow. And I have this terrible feeling that it’s my fate to stay there.

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